Reba...
I was originally going to talk about the minor things that happened to me yesterday + i thought i'll probably talk about H first when i got round to introducing people in my life but i read a post a few minutes ago by 
TayneMent and towards the end she said 'I miss a certain friend of mine but I am not going to make any effort anymore so I don't force a friendship so to speak. I hope she is doing okay though.'
Just that and i remembered Reba and how my sentiments towards her are exactly how Taynement put it. We've been (or should i say were) friends for about 5 years...short considering other friendships i've heard about, but really long for me 'cos basically, i dont stick to the same people for long (commitment issues).
Anyways, we had good and bad times as most friends do and i really thought we'll be friends if not forever for a really long time. But.... I left school, she's still in school. That wasn't a problem really. Communication was still fair and we never had problems with catching up on lost times. Until her birthday this year, I dont think we had spoken in over a week prior to that day.
So i'm wishing her a happy birthday and asking her random questions like why her phones weren't going through at 12am and dint she know it was her birthday and things. I ask about how she's always waiting for me to call her(teasing her i think, maybe i was subconsciously accusing) and about a mutual friend i heard she had a rift with.
Then she has to go and say something silly like she's only talking to/calling people who are insignificant to her and how she doesn't have time for excess baggage (not her exact words but close) and i'm like so you haven't been calling me because i'm in your words useless to you.
She says i should take it as i like and i say i hope you know the next time we'll talk will probably be on New Year's day and it might be just a text, thats if i send one at all. She says yes, probably. And that was that, i said bye, hung up and we havent spoken since then.
I don't know if she thought i was joking, or if we were just meant to not be friends. Whatever the case, i actually do miss her. Alot. But i won't be making first moves because i don't want to 'force a friendship' if it isn't meant to be, and i don't think she will either (for wat ever reasons she has) so i guess thats bye to that phase. I really wish it wasnt but what can i say.
....on a second thought though, do you think it was chidish + an over-reaction on my part? I'm just tired of all the drama.
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Reba
14 wisecracks:
I dont know what exactly happened prior to this point. did she hear somethng about you? did you say something? was she having her moments? there are too much assumptions....you might be thinking she did this, and she is thinking you did this, and at the end of the day, you both realize, everything was a big misunderstanding. I have had tons of experiences with friends and longevity of the reltionship.
I also abide by the rule that "you meet people for a season and for a purpose, when that season is passed, its better you let go. the more you latch onto it, the more unfruitful it will be"
perhaps, one day, you and your friend will really get to speak and everyone would address their "anger" or maybe not. Maybe you would forget what actually happened by then. Maybe you will grow to have closer friends who would make you forget such a person.
I had a friend and it took, almost 9 years (after we stopped communicting), before we were able to talk and address the "problem". By then, I couldnt even remember "is" from "was" about the whole friendship, but it was entertaining.
lol....i no evn no wetin to call d girl but nyway...i loved 'gods are nt to be blamed' by ola rotimi,'wrong bride' by one woman lik dat and then 'the gift' by julie garwood
I don't think you over-reacted or were childish, to not contact her any longer..
Sounds like she pretty much made it clear that she's not too interested in being friends with you..
Anyone in their right mind would have probably reacted the same way..
You didn't overreact or behave childish. She already indirectly told you that you weren't significant.
I have problem choosing a best.....I love all John Grisham books and the twilight series and lately....Change of Heart by Jodi Picoult.
hmm.
You know what, I say, make one more try for it...swallow your pride and try. If it still doesn't work, you know you've done what you could and it's not meant to be. Pure and simple.
It took me a while but I am now following your blog. A sincere Thank you for your wonderful comment on my blog.
@ naija girl, we dint have any problems o. at least not that i knew of and the kinda relationship we had, we never used to bottle up things (or so i thought). Maybe she was 'having her moments' like you put it but did she have to take it out on me? really!
anyhu, its all gone now. maybe it was for a season, maybe not but watever happens next would be up to her. i'm done trying.
@leggy: yeah i've read the god's are not to blame. nice...i'll look for the other two u mentioned (especially the one by the nameless lady.lol)
@rocnaija nd rene: thanks jo. reaction justified. yay. i've read almost all the john grisham's, i'll try the other two books
@adaeze: i personally dont think i'm willing to try again. it has little to do with pride. (although i cant deny pride is involved) I think she gets her way too often so this time if she's still interested in the friendship, she should make the first move.
thanks for following and you're welcome...
I happened to just stumble across your blog and I had to blink twice when I saw Taynement, lol. Thanks for reading, I always assume only my friends read my blog. I totally know how you feel, my instinct is to always reach out but at some point I guess you have to get the message, although as someone said, its prolly unresolved, undiscussed issues.
My favorite book is The Diary of Anne Frank.I really enjoyed Jodi Picoult's Tenth Circle.
*adds to blog roll*
If you don't mind, may I suggest a different background or font colors for your blog, some of the font colors make it hard to read sometimes.
welcome to blogville...:)
on the friend thing...I admit that i'm usually the one guilty of not keeping in touch..but I do try to make a conscious effort to be better about it.
I think that if that's the last conversation you had with her...you probably left some things unsaid..maybe you can send her an email explaining how you feel..not in an accusing manner and see if she responds...
Favorite book of all time..hmm..Angels and Demons
@Taynement: funny, i was thinking about changing the background already. hope this is better.
I had no unresolved, undiscussed issues with her and i thought if she had issues with me she'd just come out plain and tell me.
@Kate: funny, i'm usually guilty of not keeping intouch. but when i got these particular set of friends, i made extra extra efforts to keep in touch because they tend to take things way too personally at times.
I have no hard feelings towards her suprisingly, lets just say i'm doing her a favour cos it seems to be how she wants things.
p.s. thanks, hope i enjoy my stay on blogville
Nah, you didn't overreact. I only need to hear half of that to be done with it...she was direct enough. Ah ahn even after u mentioned new year she still said yea...oti o.
If you want closure you can reach out and state you case but be ready for the fact that she might not respond. Personally, i won't bother.
Always two sides to a story....i'm just saying.
@repressed one, i def don't need any closure.
@blogoratti, yeah i know, 2 sides and all but for as long as her side is untold, i really cant be bothered.
Okay in ur shoes I wud have said..SOD OFF! but I'm not in ur shoes...which is why I think you shud tell her to SOD OFF! Some pple aren't worth the effort you know, you think ur friends but it's just one person being sincere and the other pretending..
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